There was an Englishman, a Frenchman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a train carriage going through Provence. Suddenly, the train went through a tunnel and, being one of the older-style trains with no carriage lighting, it went completely dark.



Then there was a kissing sound, followed by the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Englishman were sitting as if nothing had happened, and the Frenchman had a nasty red slap mark on his face.



The Frenchman was thinking: "The English fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead."



Claudia Schiffer was thinking: "The French fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the English fella and got slapped for it."



The Englishman was thinking: "This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel, I'll make another kissing noise and slap that French ****** again."