Some Funnaise
02-20-2005, 07:40 AM
#1
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Ireland
Posts: 907
Q: What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Q: What's a mixed feeling?
A: When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
Q: What's the height of conceit?
A: Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.
Q: What's the definition of macho?
A: Jogging home from your vasectomy.
Q: What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A: A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Q: Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A: They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick.
Q: Why is divorce so expensive?
A: Because it's worth it.
Q: What is a Yankee?
A: The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
Q: What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A: They both like a tight seal.
Q: What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
A: Their ***** are just for decoration.
Q: What is the difference between "ooooooh" and "aaaaaaah"?
A: About three inches.
Q: Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A: For traction in the mud.
Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A: The grip.
Q: How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A: It's not hard.
Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.
Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
A: The swallow.
Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.
Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A: They don't have ***** to scratch.
Mark
A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Q: What's a mixed feeling?
A: When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
Q: What's the height of conceit?
A: Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.
Q: What's the definition of macho?
A: Jogging home from your vasectomy.
Q: What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A: A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Q: Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A: They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick.
Q: Why is divorce so expensive?
A: Because it's worth it.
Q: What is a Yankee?
A: The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
Q: What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A: They both like a tight seal.
Q: What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
A: Their ***** are just for decoration.
Q: What is the difference between "ooooooh" and "aaaaaaah"?
A: About three inches.
Q: Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A: For traction in the mud.
Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A: The grip.
Q: How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A: It's not hard.
Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.
Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
A: The swallow.
Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.
Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A: They don't have ***** to scratch.
Mark
02-20-2005, 01:32 PM
#2
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2002
Location: California
Posts: 22,465
Originally Posted by inanimate_object' date='Feb 20 2005, 05:40 AM
Q: Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A: They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick.
Mark
A: They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick.
Mark
lol, loving the sheep jokes! i told the kilt joke to a scot, and he knew it had something to do with the zipper and some kind of animal
02-20-2005, 01:52 PM
#3
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Ky
Posts: 2,723
Originally Posted by j9fd3s' date='Feb 20 2005, 02:31 PM
lol, loving the sheep jokes! i told the kilt joke to a scot, and he knew it had something to do with the zipper and some kind of animal
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