phinsup

uhh i dont get it

banzaitoyota

For the younger set: I present for your purousal:





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Ty-D-Bol Man - The Ty-D-Bowl Company had a very strange nautical spokesperson to advertise the merits of their toilet bowl cleaning product. Precariously balanced in a small boat floating inside a toilet water basin, the Ty-D-Bowl man (wearing a Captain's hat, blazer and turtleneck) greeted a TV housewife when she lifted the basin lid and proceeded to sell her and the viewing audience on the advantages of his product. This has got to be the worst location any commercial spokesman ever had to live. Comedian George Carlin once commented on one of his comedy albums "They're approving some pretty weird things, man. Like the guy in the toilet is pretty strange. Originally, it's a row boat. Then he got a speedboat. Then he was on a raft with two calypso guy musicians and two bushels of lemons [singing] "We put the lemon in the Ty-D-Bol for you." Actors who portrayed the role of the Ty-D-Bol Man included Fred Miltonberg, Larry Sprinkle and Mark Matheisen. TRIVIA NOTE: In 1958 Harry O'Hare Sr. developed Ty-D-Bol, a liquid cleanser/disinfectant for the toilet bowl that is still sold today by Sara Lee Corporation. He also helped pioneer the use of chlorinators to clean swimming pools. O'Hare sold Ty-D-Bol Chemical in 1960 for less than $100,000. In 1988 at the age of 67 O'Hare developed a new product called the Watergizer, an electro-chemical process that cleans and softens a household's water supply far better than other systems on the market. It was developed by HOH Water Technology Corp, a Newbury Park firm organized by O'Hare in 1979. In 1991 color consultant James Mandle changed the color of Ty-D-Bol's toilet bowl cleanser bottle from light blue and green to stark white letters on a dark background. In an 18 month period following the change of color, sales of Ty-D-Bol jumped 40%. The 1992 "Ty-D-Bol Spring Cleaning Report" asked 1,006 American adults what they would choose if they "had the power to throw out what exists and start all over again." The winner, picked by 49 percent, was the U.S. Congress. In 1994 Ty-D-Bol Automatic Toilet Bowl Cleaner -the Blue liquid in a Sanitizing Formula - was promoted as being "the only automatic bowl cleaner so powerful, it goes beyond clean to kill 99.9% of toilet bowl germs with every flush. And it's the only automatic you can buy that's registered with the United States E.P.A." See also PROPS - TOILETS: "Toilets"

banzaitoyota

Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me

It is reeking and it's not something I want to do

Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, lend a hand to me

Swab the toilet; I would like to see the porcelain gleam



Though I know that last night's dinner left skid-marks in the bowl

Had sh*t running out my hole

'Cause diarrhea can be very disconcerting

And when I tried to pass some pee, I found that I must hold

doo-doo almost touched my pole

Just the thought of that sure interrupts my streaming



Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me

It is reeking and it's not something I want to do

Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, lend a hand to me

Swab the toilet; I would like to see the porcelain gleam



I don't care to think no further 'bout that nasty, caked-on sh*t

It just makes no sense to trip, tried to clean it; almost flipped

My nose it caught a whiff; that made my eyes tear up -

I find I'm vomiting

It isn't that I just don't care; that just is not the case

I don't like to clean up waste; if you clean it I will pay

I promise I'll be generous



Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, please do this for me

I am freaking 'cause it's not something I want to do

Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man sh*t scrubbin's not for me

When you finish please make sure you leave the toilet brush clean



Though you might hear farting, gasps and moaning when I have the runs

I can tell you it's no fun; seems like I have sh*t a ton

Now my butt's so sore I do not feel like wiping

And though I feel some traces of crap between my thighs

At this time I'm of no mind to wipe more on my behind

That would cause my teeth to grind; and so no more I'll be wiping

because it's chaffing



Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me

It is reeking and it's not something I want to do

Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, lend a hand to me

Swab the toilet; I would like to see the porcelain gleam



Now everything is smearing around the edge of my behind

Feel's like that it's ruined this time; it hurts so bad that I grieve

It's caused shaking in my knees; and it's hurting like a bitch

So I launch a twisted screech now in my sorrow

I've messed my pants and now I cry; I wish I had clean briefs

I don't have a pair with me; so I'm stuck in these bunged-pants

This is making me irate, leaving stains upon my shorts

Sure hope these runs go away before tomorrow



Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me

I am freaking 'cause it's not something I want to do

Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, please do this for me

When you finish please make sure you leave the toilet brush clean

Rob x-7

guy has been sniffing remains for too long

1988RedT2

I think the world would like to know who the author is.

1988RedT2

So it's supposed to be some kind of manly knitting needle?

phinsup

more like an un-knitting needle.

Rob x-7

oh chef of the future- can it core an apple?