Are You Gay?
Thread Starter
Senior Member
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 6,331
From: Frederick MD
Are you gay?
1. If you are over thirty and you have a washboard
stomach, you are gay. It means you haven't sucked back
enough beer with the boys and have spent the rest of
your free time doing sit-ups, ! aerobics, and doing the
Oprah diet.
2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaming homo. A cat
is like a dog, but gay - it grooms itself constantly
but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch
except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed.
And just think about how you call a ! dog..."Killer,
come here! I said get your *** over here!" Now think
about how you call a cat..."Bun-bun, come to daddy,
snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so
gay.
3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby
pacifiers, or any such nonsense, rest assured, you are
a *******. A straight man only sucks on bar-b-que
ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, crawfish guts, pickled
pigs feet, or breasts. Anything else and you are in
training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a ***.
4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom
or **** in a parking lot, you're in a deep homosexual relationship. A man's world is his bathroom; he defecates and urinates where he pleases.
5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you like
a high hard one in the poop chute. Coffee is to be had
strong, black, and full aroma. A straight man will
never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim"
and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener
tastes like. If you've had NutraSweet in your mouth,
you've had a man there too.
6. If you know more than six names of colors or four
different types of dessert, you might as well be
handing out free passes to your ***. A real man
doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all
of that crap as well as all the names of all the
players in the Major league, NFL, NBA, college ball,
PGA, and NASCAR. If you can pick out chartreuse or you
know what a "fressier" is you're gay. And if you can
name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are
faggadoci! ous.
7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it......you're hungry for a meat popsicle. A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-*** driver or to cut the punk off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a hamburger! , hold his beer, or play with the bitch in the passenger seat.
8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films,
mon-frere, vous le Gay, oui? The only time it is
acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who
knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above
films by yourself or with another man is likely to
result in SHC (spontaneous homosexual combustion),
which is what happens to **** when they flame out too quickly.
1. If you are over thirty and you have a washboard
stomach, you are gay. It means you haven't sucked back
enough beer with the boys and have spent the rest of
your free time doing sit-ups, ! aerobics, and doing the
Oprah diet.
2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaming homo. A cat
is like a dog, but gay - it grooms itself constantly
but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch
except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed.
And just think about how you call a ! dog..."Killer,
come here! I said get your *** over here!" Now think
about how you call a cat..."Bun-bun, come to daddy,
snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so
gay.
3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby
pacifiers, or any such nonsense, rest assured, you are
a *******. A straight man only sucks on bar-b-que
ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, crawfish guts, pickled
pigs feet, or breasts. Anything else and you are in
training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a ***.
4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom
or **** in a parking lot, you're in a deep homosexual relationship. A man's world is his bathroom; he defecates and urinates where he pleases.
5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you like
a high hard one in the poop chute. Coffee is to be had
strong, black, and full aroma. A straight man will
never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim"
and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener
tastes like. If you've had NutraSweet in your mouth,
you've had a man there too.
6. If you know more than six names of colors or four
different types of dessert, you might as well be
handing out free passes to your ***. A real man
doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all
of that crap as well as all the names of all the
players in the Major league, NFL, NBA, college ball,
PGA, and NASCAR. If you can pick out chartreuse or you
know what a "fressier" is you're gay. And if you can
name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are
faggadoci! ous.
7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it......you're hungry for a meat popsicle. A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-*** driver or to cut the punk off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a hamburger! , hold his beer, or play with the bitch in the passenger seat.
8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films,
mon-frere, vous le Gay, oui? The only time it is
acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who
knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above
films by yourself or with another man is likely to
result in SHC (spontaneous homosexual combustion),
which is what happens to **** when they flame out too quickly.
Administrator
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 24,416
From: Stuart, FL
I think that thing was written by a closet homosexual He certainly wasn't very literate
that doesn't even make sense??? That would essentially mean that a man never leaves the bathroom...., maybe the illiterate retard meant "The world is a man's bathroom", either way it's stupid.
That whole page looks more like some guy was feeling gay and he's homophobe, so he decided to sit down and write down all the reasons he wasn't gay.
-I don't suck on lolly pops
-I **** where I please
-etc, etc.
What a ***!
A man's world is his bathroom
That whole page looks more like some guy was feeling gay and he's homophobe, so he decided to sit down and write down all the reasons he wasn't gay.
-I don't suck on lolly pops
-I **** where I please
-etc, etc.
What a ***!
Thread Starter
Senior Member
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 6,331
From: Frederick MD
Originally Posted by phinsup' date='Jun 1 2004, 10:54 AM
I think that thing was written by a closet homosexual He certainly wasn't very literate that doesn't even make sense??? That would essentially mean that a man never leaves the bathroom...., maybe the illiterate retard meant "The world is a man's bathroom", either way it's stupid.
That whole page looks more like some guy was feeling gay and he's homophobe, so he decided to sit down and write down all the reasons he wasn't gay.
-I don't suck on lolly pops
-I **** where I please
-etc, etc.
What a ***!
That whole page looks more like some guy was feeling gay and he's homophobe, so he decided to sit down and write down all the reasons he wasn't gay.
-I don't suck on lolly pops
-I **** where I please
-etc, etc.
What a ***!
