The talking dog.
#1
A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of
a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells
him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever
sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks.
"Yes, I do," the Lab replies.
"So, what's your story?"
The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk
when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the
CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from
country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders,
because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their
most valuable spies for eight years running.
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't
getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job
at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious
characters and listening in.
"I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of
medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just
retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he
wants for the dog. "Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you
selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that ****."
a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells
him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever
sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks.
"Yes, I do," the Lab replies.
"So, what's your story?"
The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk
when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the
CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from
country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders,
because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their
most valuable spies for eight years running.
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't
getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job
at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious
characters and listening in.
"I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of
medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just
retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he
wants for the dog. "Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you
selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that ****."
#10
Originally Posted by teknics' post='798012' date='Jan 30 2006, 06:31 PM
thats a penthouse joke, then a playboy joke, then finally found its way into FHM.
its old as sin.
kevin.
So's yer underpants!