Polish Divorce
#1
A Polish man married a Canadian girl after he had been in Canada a year
or so and, although his English was far from perfect, they got on very
well. Until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he
could arrange a divorce for him-"very quick". The lawyer said that the
speed of getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked him
the
following questions:
LAWYER: Have you any grounds ?
POLE: JA, JA, an acre and half and a nice little home with 3 bedrooms.
LAWYER "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
POLE: It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," he responded.
LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
POLE: "No," he replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really
needed one."
LAWYER "I mean, What are your relations like?"
POLE: "All my relations are in Poland."
LAWYER: "is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLE: "Yes, we have hi fidelity stereo set & DVD player with 6.1 sound.We
don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is
yes."
LAWYER: No, I mean Does your wife beat you up?
POLE: NO, I'm always up before her.
LAWYER: is your wife a nagger?
POLE: NO, she white.
LAWYER: WHY do you want this divorce?
POLE: SHE going to kill me.
LAWYER: What makes you think that?
POLE: I got proof.
LAWYER: What kind of proof?
POLE: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the drug store and
put on shelf in bathroom. I can read - it says, "Polish Remover".
or so and, although his English was far from perfect, they got on very
well. Until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he
could arrange a divorce for him-"very quick". The lawyer said that the
speed of getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked him
the
following questions:
LAWYER: Have you any grounds ?
POLE: JA, JA, an acre and half and a nice little home with 3 bedrooms.
LAWYER "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
POLE: It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," he responded.
LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
POLE: "No," he replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really
needed one."
LAWYER "I mean, What are your relations like?"
POLE: "All my relations are in Poland."
LAWYER: "is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLE: "Yes, we have hi fidelity stereo set & DVD player with 6.1 sound.We
don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is
yes."
LAWYER: No, I mean Does your wife beat you up?
POLE: NO, I'm always up before her.
LAWYER: is your wife a nagger?
POLE: NO, she white.
LAWYER: WHY do you want this divorce?
POLE: SHE going to kill me.
LAWYER: What makes you think that?
POLE: I got proof.
LAWYER: What kind of proof?
POLE: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the drug store and
put on shelf in bathroom. I can read - it says, "Polish Remover".