I was born long ago, but my parents didn't let me watch too much TV.

 

haha

 

banzai = teh not funny one

 

Jersey Guy Paulie Herman



Paulie Herman.....Joe Piscopo

Phyllis Carroll.....Deborah Harry

Photographer.....Matthew Laurence









[ open on interior, Valentine's boutique - Jersey Guy Paulie Herman enters ]



Paulie Herman: Wow! Look at all the cards here! They got cards for everything! Birthday.. graduation.. ah, here's a nice one.. [ grabs card ] ..let's see what it says here.. [ reads ] "Had I known, I would have called.. but I just found out, you're going bald." [ laughs ] What's this one say here, uh.. [ reads ] "The earth, the wind, the sun, the moon. Together, we are us." Brilliant. [ approaches woman ] Um.. excuse me, Miss? Could you help me?



Phyllis Carroll: Oh, sure!



Paulie Herman: Hey.. can I ask you something? Where you from?



Phyllis Carroll: I'm from Jersey! [ laughs ] Are you from Jersey?



Paulie Herman: [ surprised ] Wooooww! Yeah! Yeah! I'm from Jersey! [ laughs ] And you're from Jersey! [ laughs ] I'm from Jersey! [ laughs ] Paulie Herman!



Phyllis Carroll: Phyllis Carroll.



Paulie Herman: Hello, Phyllis, great to meet you! do you work here?



Phyllis Carroll: Oh, no.. I weork in a chemical plant.



Paulie Herman: No kidding?!



Phyllis Carroll: Yeah!



Paulie Herman: Which one?



Phyllis Carroll: United Chemical, Matahorn Plant.



Paulie Herman: Oh, I can't believe it! I work at United in Briskataway! Hey, did you have that big radiation scare at the plant cafeteria last month?



Phyllis Carroll: Yeah!



Paulie Herman: We did, too! The baloney glowed for a week! [ laughs ] Yeah, but I ate it anyway! [ laughs ] I imagine a pretty girl like yourself gets a lot of Valentine's Day cards, huh?



Phyllis Carroll: Oh, you'd be surprised. Aren't you sending a lot of cards?



Paulie Herman: Oh, maybe just one or two.. Hey! Phyllis, maybe you can help me pick out one, huh?



Phyllis Carroll: Oh, I'd love to!



Paulie Herman: Oh, boy!



Phyllis Carroll: [ grabs card ] Oh, here's a nice one.



Paulie Herman: [ reads ] "I lvoe you! I want you! I need you!"



Phyllis Carroll: Who's it for?



Paulie Herman: My Uncle Bennie. [ shakes head ] Nah.. I don't think so..



Phyllis Carroll: Oh, I got an idea!



Paulie Herman: What?



Phyllis Carroll: You can have your picture taken over there for five dollars, and you can send that to your Uncle Bennie!



Paulie Herman: Oh, great idea! [ suave ] Would you so honor this fellow Jerseyite, and appear in this photograph with me?



Phyllis Carroll: Oh, it would be my pleasure!



Paulie Herman: Right this way, madam! [ walks over to the photorapher ] Hi! We'd like our picture taken, please!



Photographer: Sure, sure. Sit down.



Paulie Herman: [ sits ] Thank you very much!



Photographer: You're welcome. [ preps his camera ] Okay. Husband and wife, right?



Paulie & Phyllis: [ laughing ] No!



Photographer: Brother and sister, right?



Paulie & Phyllis: [ laughing ] Naw!



Photographer: Well.. then what are you?



Paulie & Phyllis: We're from Jersey!! [ laugh ]



[ fade to black ]

 

I guess you had to be there.

 

not bothering....since i already know it wont be funny



again proving my theory that:



banzai = teh not funny one

 

You like to repeat stuff a lot, don't you?

 

Its the exposure to the chemicals