Life's "reposts"
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,871
From: London, Ontario
Originally Posted by banzaitoyota' date='Jan 6 2005, 10:14 PM
I dunno, all their employees could probably see in the dark anyway...........
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 907
From: Ireland
Over here Lucas are known as th Prince of darkness - here's some crap jokes for whoever asked (I also have some Lada ones that suck equally as much):
Lucas denies having invented darkness. But they still claim "sudden, unexpected darkness."
Lucas--inventor of the first intermittent wiper.
The three-position Lucas switch--DIM, FLICKER and OFF. The other three switch settings--SMOKE, SMOLDER and IGNITE.
The original anti-theft devices--Lucas Electric products.
"I've had a Lucas pacemaker for years and have never experienced any prob...
If Lucas made guns, wars would not start either.
It's not true that Lucas, in 1947, tried to get Parliament to repeal Ohm's Law. They withdrew their efforts when they met too much resistance.
Did you hear the one about the guy that peeked into a Land Rover and asked the owner "How can you tell one switch from another at night, since they all look the same?" "He replied, it doesn't matter which one you use, nothing happens!"
Back in the '70s Lucas decided to diversify its product line and began manufacturing vacuum cleaners. It was the only product they offered which didn't suck.
Quality Assurance phoned and advised the Engineering guy that they had trouble with his design shorting out. So he made the wires longer.
Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone.
Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb.
Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.
Recommended procedure before taking on a repair of Lucas equipment: check the position of the stars, kill a chicken and walk three times sunwise around your car chanting: "Oh mighty Prince of Darkness protect your unworthy servant."
Lucas systems actually uses AC current; it just has a random frequency.
Mark
Lucas denies having invented darkness. But they still claim "sudden, unexpected darkness."
Lucas--inventor of the first intermittent wiper.
The three-position Lucas switch--DIM, FLICKER and OFF. The other three switch settings--SMOKE, SMOLDER and IGNITE.
The original anti-theft devices--Lucas Electric products.
"I've had a Lucas pacemaker for years and have never experienced any prob...
If Lucas made guns, wars would not start either.
It's not true that Lucas, in 1947, tried to get Parliament to repeal Ohm's Law. They withdrew their efforts when they met too much resistance.
Did you hear the one about the guy that peeked into a Land Rover and asked the owner "How can you tell one switch from another at night, since they all look the same?" "He replied, it doesn't matter which one you use, nothing happens!"
Back in the '70s Lucas decided to diversify its product line and began manufacturing vacuum cleaners. It was the only product they offered which didn't suck.
Quality Assurance phoned and advised the Engineering guy that they had trouble with his design shorting out. So he made the wires longer.
Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone.
Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb.
Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.
Recommended procedure before taking on a repair of Lucas equipment: check the position of the stars, kill a chicken and walk three times sunwise around your car chanting: "Oh mighty Prince of Darkness protect your unworthy servant."
Lucas systems actually uses AC current; it just has a random frequency.
Mark
Senior Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 22,465
From: California
Originally Posted by cymfc3s' date='Jan 7 2005, 01:07 AM
LMAO. I want that fuse box for my rx7, though Im not sure where Ill mount my "Fish Finder"
under the seat? thats closest to the FISH!
Thread Starter
Super Moderator
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 12,288
From: Amityville, New York
Originally Posted by inanimate_object' date='Jan 7 2005, 07:28 AM
Over here Lucas are known as th Prince of darkness - here's some crap jokes for whoever asked (I also have some Lada ones that suck equally as much):
Mark
Mark
lol, I got a kick out of those, I thought they were rather amusing!
Originally Posted by cymfc3s' date='Jan 7 2005, 04:07 AM
LMAO. I want that fuse box for my rx7, though Im not sure where Ill mount my "Fish Finder"
depends on what kind of transducer you want
Originally Posted by TYSON' date='Jan 7 2005, 11:36 AM
that would be a kick *** idea for verts!
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