Wut gives, anyone else into these at the holiday time? I make home made mix with ice cream, man are they addictive, I can't sleep at all, too much **** going through my head so I can't sleep and the waitress at the cigar bar put her hand on my shoulder so the wife is all pissed off at me, my dad is going to the hospital in the morning, I am going to drive him, I finally talked him into it. Dude was going to drive himself, WTF.



What the hell is this topic even about, ok well anyway let's say it's the things passing through my mind now. I have tired so hard not to focus on the negative, but it seems that often the negative can't easily be ignored, it catches your thoughts like big **** catch your eye or flashing lights. I dunno.



I have become a ******* insomniac, I sleep 2 or 3 hours a day, it seems that things around me move in slowmotion.



You know I think if just a couple of my worries go away I will feel much better.



Oh yea, hot buttered rums, I love them and I don't even put much rum in them. I have a bottle of really pricy rum I bought just for them like 3 years ago and I just finished it tonight.



I am usually far better at organizing my thoughts, but I think the lack of sleep has finally stifled that feature.

 

i never sleep anyways, i got so much **** on my mind to, blew my motor, cant pay rent this month, gotta move back home to ny from il, grandma's mad sick and just a whole lot of crap that i cant control wether i like to or not...on top of that ill finally be 18 this month (good i guess?)..i dunno its just alot of **** that i cant deal with...im going to move back home, get a job, fix my car and sit home for the sake of not having to deal with drama anymore.

 

18 and you don't live at home anymore? **** I had a job and and a car, but I lived at home when I was 18, spent my money on beer, drugs and condems.



Moving home ain't so bad bro, when I was 21 or something I can't remember, I got divorced, had to move home, it sucked at first, but having the support of my Dad and what not really helped things out it turned out to be a great turning point in my life and things got a lot better from there on out.



I guees you never know what's going to be on the other side when you open the door.

 

Oh and congrats on wondering into the zoo tonight, I know this area can be a bit scary when you first stumble in.

 

heh, yeah...i dunno i moved out orginally to go to school over here at UTI...but 2 of my friends dropped out cause they said it sucks and its waste of money and so do alot of other people...i like living out here but its impossible without a car you know? im moving back home reguardless of what anyone says that im following my friends around because im not..if i had a car i would stay...so im gonna go home get a job fix my car and maybe ill go to college part time this coming fall or something to better myself...but theres so much other crap going on in my life that i dont wanna deal with its so ******* hard and stupid to be happy lately just dunno what to do...i guess ill move back home and just take each day, by day.

 

a good friend of mine drilled into my head at a young age, that even though i may have problems that in my opinion are HUGE i must always think of others and how fortunate i am to have the things i do. i'm sure if more people try to embrace this very hard principle their lives will be much easier to cope with. phins you certainly have the right to vent on your own board and you know all the homies got your back...

 

Hang in there Scott it'll all pass sooner or later. May get worse but hell you're alive, your wife probably understands and is just under stress and you have us.



OK well maybe the last part isn't the best of things to mention but. .



Yes I love buttered rum. Also like rum cake. I'd send you a rum cake but the ones I make wind up weighing about 15 pounds. :bigok:

 

Your lucky... I got drafted when I was 18 and spent 3 years wearing green.....and sleeping in tents.....