You might be an Automotive entusiast if....
06-28-2002, 04:09 AM
#1
Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 689
I copied this off another forum. So some of you might've seen this already. Some of these are funny, some not. Just remember I didn't write this.
1) If you have ever been caught doing 100 M.P.H. in a 35 M.P.H. zone, and you talked your way out of it by “popping your hood”
3) If your secondaries never close.
4) If you use NOS to go get bread and milk.
7) If the local highway patrol had to buy a Ferrari to catch you.
8) If the highway patrol complains because you out ran their Ferrari.
10) If you think 4-inch exhaust is too restrictive.
14) If the last time your “significant other” drove your car they had a triple coronary.
15) If your neighbors use your fuel pump to drain and fill their Olympic size swimming pool…. in seconds.
16) If Exxon and Goodyear send you holiday cards.
20) If you think natural aspirated motors are blasphemy.
21) If you don’t like side view mirrors because they won’t stay on the car…at 180mph.
22) If you floor it and you go back in time.
23) If your traffic fines keep the local economy going.
25) If you are no longer welcome to run in the HOT ROD power tour.
27) When you ATF the engine, the fire dept thinks the town is on fire.
28) If nobody in town will drag race you any more.
31) If your car won’t idle below 2000 R.P.M.
32) If you try to drag race the neighbor kid…. on his bicycle.
37) If you have pictures of your motor in your wallet.
41) If the government finances your insurance.
42) If you had to get a radiator off of an M1 tank.
43) If the highway patrol named an offense after you.
51) If your lawnmower has an E.T. of 9.4 @ 158 M.P.H
53) If you put a fiberglass hood in your wife’s Honda.
57) If you shaved off your window tint to save weight.
58) If you count your car as a dependent when you file your taxes.
60) If you consider detonation as a midlife crisis.
64) If you put a 12a on your kids go-kart.
66) If your blender is set up to run on NOS.
69) If you have ever done a wheels-up launch at an intersection.
71) If the inch length of your exhaust pipes is in the single digits.
74) If your valve springs can double as suspension components.
76) Instead of gas mileage you measure it as gas footage.
79) If you crack your oil pan and the government compares it to the Exxon Valdez.
83) If your motto is “women want me, tires fear me”.
86) If you have ever floored it and had a quarter panel fly off.
88) If your motor quits making power at 13,000 R.P.M.
89) If your motor starts making power at 8,000 R.P.M.
92) If you think about emissions testing and you wake up in a cold sweat.
94) If you have ever tried to get a rebuild kit for a hair dryer.
95) If you if you read your kids bedtime stories about how to do engine swaps in rotaries.
96) If you can’t sleep without first listening to your idle lope.
100) If you think front wheel drive is the antichrist.
Edited for content due to unfunny previous length
1) If you have ever been caught doing 100 M.P.H. in a 35 M.P.H. zone, and you talked your way out of it by “popping your hood”
3) If your secondaries never close.
4) If you use NOS to go get bread and milk.
7) If the local highway patrol had to buy a Ferrari to catch you.
8) If the highway patrol complains because you out ran their Ferrari.
10) If you think 4-inch exhaust is too restrictive.
14) If the last time your “significant other” drove your car they had a triple coronary.
15) If your neighbors use your fuel pump to drain and fill their Olympic size swimming pool…. in seconds.
16) If Exxon and Goodyear send you holiday cards.
20) If you think natural aspirated motors are blasphemy.
21) If you don’t like side view mirrors because they won’t stay on the car…at 180mph.
22) If you floor it and you go back in time.
23) If your traffic fines keep the local economy going.
25) If you are no longer welcome to run in the HOT ROD power tour.
27) When you ATF the engine, the fire dept thinks the town is on fire.
28) If nobody in town will drag race you any more.
31) If your car won’t idle below 2000 R.P.M.
32) If you try to drag race the neighbor kid…. on his bicycle.
37) If you have pictures of your motor in your wallet.
41) If the government finances your insurance.
42) If you had to get a radiator off of an M1 tank.
43) If the highway patrol named an offense after you.
51) If your lawnmower has an E.T. of 9.4 @ 158 M.P.H
53) If you put a fiberglass hood in your wife’s Honda.
57) If you shaved off your window tint to save weight.
58) If you count your car as a dependent when you file your taxes.
60) If you consider detonation as a midlife crisis.
64) If you put a 12a on your kids go-kart.
66) If your blender is set up to run on NOS.
69) If you have ever done a wheels-up launch at an intersection.
71) If the inch length of your exhaust pipes is in the single digits.
74) If your valve springs can double as suspension components.
76) Instead of gas mileage you measure it as gas footage.
79) If you crack your oil pan and the government compares it to the Exxon Valdez.
83) If your motto is “women want me, tires fear me”.
86) If you have ever floored it and had a quarter panel fly off.
88) If your motor quits making power at 13,000 R.P.M.
89) If your motor starts making power at 8,000 R.P.M.
92) If you think about emissions testing and you wake up in a cold sweat.
94) If you have ever tried to get a rebuild kit for a hair dryer.
95) If you if you read your kids bedtime stories about how to do engine swaps in rotaries.
96) If you can’t sleep without first listening to your idle lope.
100) If you think front wheel drive is the antichrist.
Edited for content due to unfunny previous length
06-28-2002, 12:11 PM
#9
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,493
I liked some of those... lol pretty good
Yeah Bigtime Unique went to an all you can eat salad bar!
lol I go to other forums.....
www.hondamod.com (just to see what some honda's are up to)
www.stangnet.com (been there since 99)
www.stlmustangs.com (it is a local board but they are ******** mainly)
www.mofba.com (gm board but a local one)
And of course here which is where I spend most of my time! lol
lol by the end of the week bigtime is going to need some new salad tossing hardware!!
Yeah Bigtime Unique went to an all you can eat salad bar!
lol I go to other forums.....
www.hondamod.com (just to see what some honda's are up to)
www.stangnet.com (been there since 99)
www.stlmustangs.com (it is a local board but they are ******** mainly)
www.mofba.com (gm board but a local one)
And of course here which is where I spend most of my time! lol
lol by the end of the week bigtime is going to need some new salad tossing hardware!!