Why?
Thread Starter
Super Moderator
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 5,181
From: My BIG ol TURBO-DIESEL
Why is everything carried by a boat called cargo and by a car called shipment?
Why is an open door ajar but an open jar isnt adoor?
Why door shops open 24 hours and seven days a week have locks on their doors?
If most car accidents happen within 10 miles from home then why doesnt everyone move 20 miles away?
If you try to fail and succeed, which one have you done?
Why is abbreviated such a long word?
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
If a black box recorder on a plane is designed to withstand the crash then why isnt the whole plane made out of the stuff?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
And finally, If winners never quit and quitters never win then who's the guy that came up with, quit while your ahead?
Why is an open door ajar but an open jar isnt adoor?
Why door shops open 24 hours and seven days a week have locks on their doors?
If most car accidents happen within 10 miles from home then why doesnt everyone move 20 miles away?
If you try to fail and succeed, which one have you done?
Why is abbreviated such a long word?
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
If a black box recorder on a plane is designed to withstand the crash then why isnt the whole plane made out of the stuff?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
And finally, If winners never quit and quitters never win then who's the guy that came up with, quit while your ahead?
Senior Member
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 211
From: Tucson, Arizona
this one's better. it makes fun of the english language. Here it is:
The English Language. Have you ever wondered why foreigners have
trouble with the English Language?. Let's face it. English is a crazy
language. There is no egg in the eggplant No ham in the hamburger. And
neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not
invented in England. French fries were not invented in France. We
sometimes take English for granted But if we examine its paradoxes we
find that Quicksand takes you down slowly, Boxing rings are square.
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. If writers
write, how come fingers don't fing. If the plural of tooth is teeth.
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth, If the teacher
taught, Why didn't the preacher praught. If a vegetarian eats
vegetables. What the does a humanitarian eat? Why do people recite at
a play, Yet play at a recital? Park on driveways and Drive on
parkways. You have to marvel at the unique lunacy. Of a language where
a house can burn up as it burns down. And in which you fill in a form
by filling it out. And a bell is only heard once it goes! English was
invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of
the human race (Which of course isn't a race at all) That is why when
the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they
are invisible, and why it is that when I windup my watch it starts,
but when I windup this observation, it ends.
The English Language. Have you ever wondered why foreigners have
trouble with the English Language?. Let's face it. English is a crazy
language. There is no egg in the eggplant No ham in the hamburger. And
neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not
invented in England. French fries were not invented in France. We
sometimes take English for granted But if we examine its paradoxes we
find that Quicksand takes you down slowly, Boxing rings are square.
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. If writers
write, how come fingers don't fing. If the plural of tooth is teeth.
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth, If the teacher
taught, Why didn't the preacher praught. If a vegetarian eats
vegetables. What the does a humanitarian eat? Why do people recite at
a play, Yet play at a recital? Park on driveways and Drive on
parkways. You have to marvel at the unique lunacy. Of a language where
a house can burn up as it burns down. And in which you fill in a form
by filling it out. And a bell is only heard once it goes! English was
invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of
the human race (Which of course isn't a race at all) That is why when
the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they
are invisible, and why it is that when I windup my watch it starts,
but when I windup this observation, it ends.
