Only In America!
Thread Starter
Super Moderator
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 5,181
From: My BIG ol TURBO-DIESEL
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house
faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America.....are there
handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.
3. Only in America.....do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America.....do people order
double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.
5. Only in America.....do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.
6. Only in America.....do we leave cars
worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the
garage.
7. Only in America.....do we use
answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a
call from someone we didn't want
to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot
dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
9. Only in America.....do we use the
word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poll' in Latin meaning 'many' and
'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America.....do they have
drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering.
EVER WONDER
Why the sun lightens our hair, but
darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline
"Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do
"practice"?
Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you
have to click on "Start"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial
flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest
traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved
tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two
mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for
lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box
that is used on airplanes? Why don't
they make the whole plane out of that
stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when
they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is
Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call
the airport the terminal?
faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America.....are there
handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.
3. Only in America.....do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America.....do people order
double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.
5. Only in America.....do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.
6. Only in America.....do we leave cars
worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the
garage.
7. Only in America.....do we use
answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a
call from someone we didn't want
to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot
dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
9. Only in America.....do we use the
word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poll' in Latin meaning 'many' and
'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America.....do they have
drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering.
EVER WONDER
Why the sun lightens our hair, but
darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline
"Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do
"practice"?
Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you
have to click on "Start"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial
flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest
traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved
tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two
mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for
lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box
that is used on airplanes? Why don't
they make the whole plane out of that
stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when
they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is
Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call
the airport the terminal?
Senior Member
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 4,985
From: Denver, CO
Originally Posted by rbrtech' date='Apr 18 2003, 08:29 AM
Points well stated now lets all go have some freedom fries 
Super Moderator
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 5,425
From: Tallahassee, FL
Originally Posted by j9fd3s' date='Apr 18 2003, 10:25 AM
we watched rescue 211 in amesterdamn and they were fishing cars out of the canals
mike
mike
and I'm guessing 211 is like 911? or were they just responding to calls made by complete idiots who can't dial striaght?
Senior Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 22,465
From: California
Originally Posted by Baldy' date='Apr 18 2003, 08:00 AM
[quote name='j9fd3s' date='Apr 18 2003, 10:25 AM'] we watched rescue 211 in amesterdamn and they were fishing cars out of the canals
mike
mike
and I'm guessing 211 is like 911? or were they just responding to calls made by complete idiots who can't dial striaght? [/quote]
they dont have 911 in the rest of the world, its 211. i dont know why its relavent, um yeah
mike