NoPistons -Mazda Rx7 & Rx8 Rotary Forum

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ

so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I

have never figured out why men think with their head and women with

their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't

feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to

hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman

enough for

me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for

who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I rolled over and

went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to

spend time

with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,

big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried

on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which

one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes

to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each

outfit." We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a

pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She

must have

thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was

testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even

know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,

"That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from

all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is

all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself

when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just

went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then

said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're

just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me

to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,

"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy

you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch

knows I'm smarter than she is.